The floor broke apart / the tasbeeh into ninety / nine beady reflections / and my mother is still / able to fake a surprise / when she can’t locate / them all.
March 20, 2018
MOMENTS
The floor broke apart
the tasbeeh into ninety
nine beady reflections
and my mother is still
able to fake a surprise
when she can’t locate
them all. She records
her finds in burnt
match sticks. She lines
them into a tally on
her pillow. Like this
she spends the night
trying to find sleep
in the ash. When
we were together,
she would press her
hot body into mine
in an embrace so tight,
it went through me.
Like this, I got used
to watching her hug
herself. The day I left
my world for another
the sky ruptured,
and the sun became
a bone with a fracture
so fine, the monsoon
finally found a place
warm enough to dry
itself. When time
turned to sand,
we decided to live on
in moments. In one
moment I clayed
together a flower pot
so we could hold in it
our garden if it ever
bloomed. In the other,
I came home to find
the pot cradling a tiny
hospital with walls
so empty I doubted
I was ever born.