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多煙的夏季•連作 ◎楊佳嫻 || Summer of many smokes: a poem by Yang Chia-hsien, translated by Tina Shan

我忽然屏息 / 是風吹開妳襯衫 / 一顆煙彈正微微露餡 || as if with prophecy / wind peels back your shirt / a teargas gives away its shape

一、

從衣服裡
牽出一匹馬
打開抽屜
牛奶正抵達邊緣

反常之處
我們稱之為徵兆
珠串太沉重了
等待墜落的爽快

陰影及其姊妹
已經掛好鈴鐺
誰先被牽動
誰就是鬼


二、

我多想捧著妳的
頭顱,金屬花
濃縮後的湖
像此地風吹過來
搓揉泥土般
深入妳的美

當距離近得像玻璃
界線縫合如新的傷
我渴望破壞
卻畏懼飛濺的沸油
準備了剪刀
卻層層包裹,不敢挖出

準備離開了嗎
走在陳舊的小樓裡
預感似的
我忽然屏息
是風吹開妳襯衫
一顆煙彈正微微露餡


三、

買了雷射筆預備
遠遠指出妳的軌道
擾亂,然後瞄準
因為妳是低動力前進
隱約的星船

幽靈們塞滿道路
嘩噪並且生火
煙霧散了以後
我是否仍舊完整
妳是否終將熄滅如隕石

世界將堆滿彈殼
電影總在廢墟處奏樂
來吧來我這裡
有一匹馬正在等待
來我來我這裡
牛奶將潤澤妳刺痛的眼

I.

out of my clothes
walks a horse
I open the drawer
milk arrives at the edge

moments of anomaly
we call them omens
overloaded string of beads wait
for the briskness of a fall

shadow and its sister
already harnessed with bells
whoever stirs first
becomes the ghost


II. 

how I yearn to hold your
head, metal flower blooming
a compressed lake
to seep deep into your beauty
like the wind that crumbles clay 
passing through here

boundaries stitched into new wounds
when distance is close as glass
I desire destruction
but fear sizzling oil sputter
I prepared scissors 
wrapped in layers, daring not uncover

shall we go?
walking down small old building
I suddenly hold my breath
as if with prophecy
wind peels back your shirt
a teargas gives away its shape

III.

I bought a laser pen, prepared 
to point out your trajectory from far away
to disturb, and to aim
because you are a slowly advancing
shimmering spaceship 

roads swarmed with ghosts
making clamor and fire
after smoke dissipates
will I still be whole 
will you finally go out like a falling stone

world will be strewn with bullet shells
films conduct music in the ruins
come here come to me
a horse is waiting
come now come to me
milk will soothe your eyes stung and pained